What to do when caught doing something illegal

• Say you know nothing about it.
• Deny doing it.
• Say you do not remember it.
• Say you were misinformed or lied to.
• Say you have been accused due to your race, gender, religion, sexual preference, political party affiliation, etc.
• Say you are being framed.
• Say you have moved on to more important issues.
  
• Say you look forward to a trial to prove your innocence.
• Hire a lawyer to lie for you to the press and public.
• Plead not guilty at the trial.
• When found guilty, say you are sorry and beg for forgiveness.
• Say you were wrongly convicted, and fight the conviction through appeals.
• After serving the time, go about your business the same as before as if nothing had happened—until caught again. Then repeat the process.
• Use political influence, to get a presidential pardon.